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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Brainstorm with me...

I've been thinking for several months now about writing a book about the inner life of being a pastor's wife. While there are several books along these lines, few of them have much grit and are are more of a "how to" as opposed to food for thought. I think I'd like to raise questions and encourage people to think about it diferently than they do currently.


Would any of you read it?

28 comments:

gerbmom said...

yep....

akr said...

I definitely would...I was given 3 different books but they are from the old school perspective. The funny thing is I have been working on some books for kids growing up in ministry and want to start a ministry for them...even if it's just a website. I'd call it life in a fishbowl.

tammi said...

I'd read it.

As long as it wasn't one of those daily devotionals, complete with nauseating quips about your perfectly adorable and well-behaved children, your perfect family-man husband who dotes on your very existence to sustain his daily life, and how you manage it all with your perfect Christian smile intact and vacuum lines in your carpet as your rush out the door for your church ladies "committee-of-the-moment" meeting (of which you are undoubtedly chairperson of).

You said it WASN'T going to be one of those books, right??

Vanessa said...

ROTFL....vacuum lines....bah hah hah.

I was thinking more along the lines of, you would have to be freaking crazy to want to be a pastor's wife and since I still do, I must be freaking crazy.

Amy, I think that's a great idea...all us pastor's wives would be reading on what NOT to do to mess up our children.

.....really....daily devotionals....still laughing....

you forgot getting up at 5 a.m. to have my quiet time with God.

Anonymous said...

tammi, you're hysterical! you forgot that she would have to run out the door with a jello salad of some sort that involved hours of layering and setting :)

klasieprof said...

Can we come up with some chapter titles?

1) JUST SMILE AND NOD

2) Let me help you stack those chairs

3) Of course I can watch your children, I have nothing better to do since YOU are the real person and I'm just the pastor's Wife

4) I'm the Pastor's appendage

5) More Zoloft please

6) I would NEVER consider birth control, we are trusting God for what he gives us

7) No thank you, Money for a new dress would be a sin.

8) Eat at a restruant that serves alcohol??..NO WAY!

9) I got a College Degree for this?

ooh the possibilities are mind boggling.
I think that you have to write the book as you are...being "transparent" True and real..not sugar coated wax balls that don't melt no matter how much you hold them in your hand or mouth.

-D.

Vanessa said...

There's always my personal favorite thing of all time that was said about me...


"Can't she do something to make herself look older?"

A problem solved.

Anonymous said...

yeah i'd read it

Heidi said...

You should write that book so I can have our pastor read it (insert evil laugh)

tammi said...

I get up at 5 a.m. to pee. And it's about the only quiet time I have all day.

Chapter 10: Frumpy & Wholesome or Meet Tammy Faye Baker: Finding the Perfect Appearance in Between.

Anonymous said...

man! being a pastor's wife at a big church is a completely different thing....i've never once had to deal with any of that crap..in fact half the time no one knows that john and i even belong to each other except for the shared funny last name.....but i'd definitely read the book, nessa-bean!
all those terrible sad-but-true scenarios....how do they all not slit their wrists or shoot their husbands?

Vanessa said...

we sign a code up front to not do that.

Shari Ann said...

You know I'd read it. I need all the help I can get. :) I read your post and started laughing as flipped to the comments page. Then I saw Tammi's comments and realized that we must have grown up in the same world because I was thinking the same exact things. (Way to go sis, as always hilarious) :) So ditto to Tammi.

tammi said...

D- your post made me laugh out loud. And I NEVER do that at the computer.

Shari - welcome back to the land of the living. Haven't heard from you in awhile. And don't even get me started on vacuum lines.

Chapter 11 - Cleaning Tough Stains from the Inside of your Mask. We must be ready for Sunday!

Ok....I'm really having a hard time letting this go.....

ksckzbzs - sneezing inside your church mask.

Vanessa said...

Your forgot about backbrushing your church hairdo.

You know I'd have to make it fiction to thinly veil the truth...which is of course, stranger than fiction.

qpryilg: backbrushing your 'do.

tammi said...

yprmrynt - a Baptist comb-over.

klasieprof said...

When I was 19 I was dating this guy from Gladwin..well..maybe HE was dating me..he was dating me 28-and "hairing" impaired--But what a GLORIOUS combover.
This worked good until we were at camp and went swimming. His hair was longer than mine!!! Then he just swwooped and flipped it over.

We attended church and he asked...Where do you want to sit??...I said..well how bout right behind that bald guy...OOPS..I thought he was going to have a heart attack!!
Nasty guy..ended up being a chester the molester years later

Anonymous said...

at least we know you know how to make second-hand clothes look good :)
Chapter 12: How to hide any mistakes your kids make: maintaining perfection through the generations

Chapter 13: How to maintain the perfect pitch in your voice (so you don't attract too much attention to your humanity or existence)

Chapter 14: the perfect female handshake (aka: the dead fish)

Ash, trust me--I totally understand how it feels when people don't even know who you're married to! In TN, people thought Ron was actually lying about having a wife! If I hadn't thrown a few dinner parties this year, I'm sure it would be the same situation here. I'm often referred to as the "mystery wife."

Amy said...

Is this what they mean when they call us, "Sisters in Christ?"

You guys are all TERRIBLE!

What chapter are we up to? Dish!

Anonymous said...

Amy, I think you could say that since we've all done a little "suffering together." :) Chapter 15--How to maintain your helmet hair

Vanessa said...

Chapter 20: The freakish similarities between the church women and the girls in junior high....they both wanted to eat you alive.

*Vintage is the exception of course

: )

Actually, I don't wanna make fun of any pastors wives...they all find ways of coping with the absolutely bizarre expectations placed on them . Some of the coping mechanisms are good and some of them are just...well...they cope. I have real compassion for them most of the time.

Or pastors, for that matter...

Vanessa said...

Amy Amy...welcome to the fray ;)

Heidi said...

Ha! These are sooooo funny! Its like you all peaked inside my grandparents house and took notes...or even my parents house. My mom was a pk and continues to live like she's a pastors wife. I'm happy to say I've completely shattered the mold = )

Vanessa said...

my, what an interesting lot of women we have here.....

all tied together with the similar horror of becoming less than real.

akr said...

I think we should add to the mix...

all the advice you never wanted and how to take it with a smile when you want to run out crying

reading the looks without losing your mind

how to keep the perfect household where someone can stop in at any time day or night and you still have to look and act like martha stewart

where is God in this?

Vanessa said...

I distinctly remember having

"have the house in good order at all times" on my goal list.

Just x that out right now...it won't happen....or if it does, you will know you have turned into a zombie.

akr said...

thought of another...

how to deal with the emergancy phone call any time of day or night

Heidi said...

On a slightly serious, but cool note... my daughter and i have been having conversations about God lately. The house looks like crap, but my 5 year old wants to talk about God. the whole house being perfect at all times post brought that to mind = )

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