Saturday, April 08, 2006

Time to go...

The time to leave the Hollyhock House is nigh. We need to leave and we want to leave. We just don't know where we are going.

It has been strange how a number of things have converged at the same general vicinity in time:

1. IBC has called a new pastor
2. The school-year ends in a few weeks.
3. Robb has been named interim manager until the District Manager can interview Robb for the manager's position.
4. Vintage Fellowship activities are about to begin in full force.
5. Our time at Hollyhock House is ending.
6. Sara is finishing college as well as other people who will remain nameless, but who visited us last week.
7. Tax-return time.
8. Lent & Easter
9. The removal of the last visible ebay box from the storage unit.

I am antsy. Preoccupied. I poured apple juice (instead of milk) into my coffee, which cracked my kids up. I feel like I need to hurry. I want to list everything I can on ebay just to get it out of here, but I can only list 40 things. I want to pack up and stand at the door. Unless the house in MI sells, we can't get another mortgage, which means renting. If we rent, it needs to be in the right school district so that Mattie doesn't have to be shifted around again. But I don't have a flinging-flanging clue which school district is the right one for us. I try to pray, but I've already asked God so many times, it feels like "vain repetition". How many ways are there to say, Please, make the house sell!

I write this knowing full-well that we have been in tight situations before, and God has always been faithful. I am not going to lie, though, and say that I feel full of faith and that some beam of light is shining on me from heaven, making me confident and cheerful. I'm only human. I'm anxious. It's part of the journey. I'm doing my best to trust God and wait for Him to do His thing.


Shari said...

Your honesty and vulnerability are so refreshing and encouraging. We are praying for you guys. I know God has great things planned for you, its just the patience that is hard. I totally understand that. (It has never been one of my strengths) :) Just know that you are loved and not alone in your journey. And please don't drink the coffee with apple juice in it. (Gross!)

Sara said...

Honesty, is the best policy when it comes to God, he knows what you're thinking, he knows what you're really feeling, i gave up trying to put up superspiritual holiness when talking with God.

I often find that in the times of my most opened, honest prayers, where i don't hold anything back are the prayers that he answers in ways that i would never have imagined.

So, keep praying with deep earnesty, the prayer that i've been praying this past week for you....with eagerness, anticipation, anxiety, and even tears at times..."GOD! GOD! PLEASE SELL THAT HOUSE!"

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