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Friday, June 05, 2009

Just Rambling....



So I've had the fleeting thought that maybe I should just shut down this blog since it's not really headed toward Pioneer Woman status. But then I think, where would I work out all my angsty questions and post pictures of my kids in souvenir t-shirts...facebook? Heaven forbid. So I think I'll just keep coming here to sit down and ponder and reflect. Even if nobody comments, it's darn good therapy.

So summer has been here for 4 days so far, and my kids have already had two sleepovers, one trip to the the library, pizza, and of course, tested the capacity of our pool.

I'm still in bed. Again. Because I don't know what I want/need to do with the day. When you reach that absolutely bizarre stage of life when your youngest can make cereal for herself, you must also reach the bizarre stage of life when you have to determine what may be the weirdest question I've answered since Charleigh's last one (on average, about 8 seconds ago and it began with "Why do you...") My own strange question: "What do you want to do?"

This question scares the crap out of me. I'm completely paralyzed by it in fact. It, and by its monstrously overgrown counterpoint, posed to me by a friend on Monday, "What do you want out of life?"

Dang. Every once in a while, you really do have to answer that question just to make sure your inner compass is on track with the trajectory of your life. Mostly, life is hemmed in by "I ought to's" and certainly it is girded with "I have to's" but every once in a while, there is a dead calm and a glimpse from the top of the mountain, and you are free to ponder "I could...."

10 comments:

Amy said...

Lonnggggg time lurker coming out in the open to say that I love your blog and would be most unhappy if it went away - I hope (please!) you'll stay with it. I love the randomness of your topics and the fact that you're willing to share your life. Helps the rest of know we're not in this alone. :-) Inspiring! Have an amazing weekend.

G said...

With Amy on this one...

Also, I know every time you get that glimpse from the top of the mountain rather than think I could, you should think I can.

And I can comment more, let you know that if a tree falls in your blog I'm around to hear it.

Carrie said...

it would be so sad to see your blog go! how would we keep up with the ryerse family?? facebook is not the same!

Anonymous said...

Yep.
I only have a half dozen or so blogs that I read who are strangers. Pioneer Woman is one, and you are another. So what do you think about that? :-)
It's funny. I just wrote a gazillion words exploring that question. I came up with...I don't know. Ha ha!
Nice to meet you. Please keep blogging.

Sara said...

hmmm...i'd say that you have a following...unlike my blog...lol. But you're right it is good therapy when we need some.

oh, and didn't you ask me that question right before Ellie was born?

Anonymous said...

Who me? Sorry if I rocked your world too much! My youngest has been making cereal for a long time now!

And I can't live without your blog! You inspire me!

Annie

Vanessa said...

Wow. Thank you all. There's so much pressure out there to be amazing at everything. It's nice to know you appreciate my unstudied sketches of what's going on in my world.

seriously. thank you.

Keri said...

Always been a fan of this blog before it was called that- it was just the live version... Shakespeare and Williams, singing into hairbrushes and spying on ex boyfriends on the dorm lawn. Oh, and the engagement at Dr. Carter's, and the breaking up with T___ saga... anyways, don't want the happiness to end.

Unknown said...

Is that what you would like? Pioneer Woman status? Would that make you feel better? I wouldn't like to be that famous. You know why? I hate not being able to comment when someone comes over to say hi. If 300 or 400 someones came over, how could you say hi? That is what I think about. If that is what you want though, I hope you get it some day. You are very compelling.

Stephanie said...

Not only therapy, but great memories ... I was just looking back over old posts and thinking, hey I forgot that! and it really wasn't that long ago. :)

Thanks for your comment today. I don't know if it's any help to know this, but in my years of working with Migrant Education in PA and also living for a year in south Texas I discovered that the newest generation of Hispanic children are not holding onto their Spanish much. They actually prefer to interact in English in social settings like school and/or church. So hopefully the language may not be such an issue for Charleigh.

I suppose I should really let my husband talk on the subject since basically he lived this. He's more of the expert than I am. Like he used to say at churches on pre-field, he "had the name but didn't play the game" (ie, Pedro Garcia who doesn't speak Spanish!) I think it was actually more of an issue when we chose to move to Latin America than it was for him growing up in Michigan.

Hope this helps a little. Have a great day!

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