Transform Your Look

Messing around with photo editing

I took this shot of Sara & Carl for their engagement and printed it for the shower last night, which I have to say was one of the funniest bridal showers I've ever been to. We laughed so hard our sides ached, thanks to Hannah.

So I found this free program yesterday afternoon and I'm currently trying out their "blog this" feature. So far, I really like it!

 

Not Broken....yet...

Shortly after we decided to take Vin to the clinic, my neighbor -a chiropractor- came over to say that he would be at his office soon and that we were welcome to bring Vin there for his x-ray. He only charged us 30 dollars (shew) and it shows no break. He did tell us though, that for kids, hairline fractures sometimes don't show up until a week later when new bone growth begins. He's hurt it twice since then today, but it is probably just a bad bruise.

Shew...the thought of that pool out there and a kid with a cast all summer was almost more than I could take....

Mom, my arm hurts...

When my husband was a little boy, he was rolling down the little hill by his church, jumping off the stairs to launch himself into a faster roll. As the story goes, he went inside and told his mom, "My arm hurts."

My mother in law, like most of the good moms I know said, "You'll be fine, go back out to play."

He returned minutes later with a "Mom, my arm hurts." and again, she said, "You are okay...go play."

Finally, when he returned for a third time, she took off his coat and found his arm hanging oddly...broken.

Fast forward 20 years to our small group party on Sunday night. Calvin took a tumble onto the raised corner of concrete driveway. One of our friends is a nurse and she didn't think it was broken, but he went to bed with ice and woke up complaining the next morning. I waffled about taking him to the doctor but decided to wait and watch. He seemed fine until later in the day when he was riding his scooter, hit the curvy part in the sidewalk and fell...on the same arm. He screamed like a maniac and this time I was pretty sure he had finished the job. Once he calmed down, I asked him to help me understand how much it hurt.

In a moment of either brilliance or just plain awfullness, I told him, "If your arm is broken, you won't be able to swim for the rest of the summer and I'll have to spend your birthday money at the doctor." He sucked his bottom lip in and said, "I'll be okay."

And he did seem just fine. Until he fell out of his sister's top bunk and fell on...you guessed it...his arm. "My arm hurts" indeed. He eventually went on to play and doesn't seem to be favoring it. If you squeeze it a certain way, he flinches. It looks even and not lumpy like it did when (a couple of years ago) he broke his other arm...

Last night he had a fever. But it is gone this morning. Are these things related? Does he have some kind of infection swarming around a broken bone? Am I the mother who wouldn't take her kid to the doctor when he really needed to go? WHY DIDN'T I GO TO MEDICAL SCHOOL????

James Thurber

"All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why."

Counterintuitive

Counterintuitive is one of my favorite words.

coun·ter·in·tu·i·tive (koun'tər-ĭn-tōō'ĭ-tĭv, -tyōō'-) Pronunciation Key
adj. Contrary to what intuition or common sense would indicate.

Not only do I like the way it rolls off your tounge, I also just plain like the concept...that there is an expected way that you would think about things, but the reality is altogether different. There is a hidden-ness to truth sometimes.

Jesus was hands down, the most counterintuitive person who ever lived...a surprising person who constantly turned people's intuitions upside down. I can think of several verses, memorized when I was a kid so forgive the King James, that recall this mysteriousness to mind...

"There is a way that seems right to a person, but the end is the way of death."
"Narrow is the way, and few that find it."
"Whoever seeks his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake, will find it..."

I've been living in my own intuition lately. Handling situations according to quick processes..."Deal with now" or "Stuff it away for later." This is a normal way of handling life, I suppose, but eventually that closet full of "Deal with later" junk comes piling down on you.

It was piling down on me...for a couple of weeks now, I have been sinking lower and lower...nothing was enjoyable, nothing had any flavor, I just wanted to go to bed...the all too familiar feelings of depression wrapping around my ankles and keeping me from any movement at all. I felt dead...except for anger. I felt plenty of anger...for the silliest reasons.

And so I dwelt on it. What is wrong with me? Why do I feel this way? I should be happy...things are good. I must be crazy. Maybe I should go on medication? Why can't I feel anything???

Usually, in thinking things over, I can come up with whatever it is that is dragging me down...ah...but here is the counterintuitive part...I needed to step away and stop dwelling...Stop trying to put the pieces together.

So I read a book by the pool yesterday. I never do that. I know, I should, but I don't. The kids splashed and I delved into The Tipping Point....mostly as a favor to hubby. it is a good read, and unexpectedly pulled me away from my mental and emotional jigsaw puzzle.

Several hours later, I dragged myself through chores, only to have a flash of insight. I finally put the pieces together...why I am so depressed and angry. Robb called at about that time and I just poured it out to him. The more I talked, the more I could feel myself defrosting...finding emotions frozen below the surface. I cried...I can't remember when I've cried in months...

Of course, these things are still painful to me, but at least they are not stuffed away. They are out in the light of day where they appear much more manageable than they were, crammed in my "deal with later closet."

The next step is also counterintuitive. In our American culture, you don't talk with somebody you are upset with...you gossip about it, blog about it, vent about it, but you don't really deal with it, because it seems quicker and easier to gripe about it with enough people that it loses its sting. But the Bible says we are supposed to go to people and try to work it out. Ridiculously counterintuitive. We tell ourselves, "talking will only make it worse" or "It won't change anything." It might not. But at least we have done what lies with us to make things better. We've exercised the full extent of our abilities to set things right. We've done our best. And while it seems like an inefficient waste of time and emotion, it could be the very best route across an emotional canyon we can't see the bottom of.

So Daisy tells me ....it's a cake mix....

Best darn cake mix I've eaten in awhile...

Cheating...

So Fatness/Skinniness Contest notwithstanding, I'm eating a piece of Daisy's cinnamon cake for breakfast. She made it for the party last night and it's so good, I don't even care....

go ahead and judge me. The cake is that good.

Lost in Translation...or else I'm going to Japan....

Received this email this morning regarding one of my ebay sales (actually the little green purse I made...going all the way to Japan...who knew...).
Hello. I completed payment.
I remitted　25.89 dollars (an commodity of 15.90 dollars and the postage of 23.15 dollars ) in total in PayPal.
Please confirm it.
Vintage Jewelry-Decorated-Green Gold Wicker Purse SWEET(Item #160127563286）
Please send it to Japan by air mail.

I want you to send the commodity surely by not shipping service but the air mail.

Please send merchandise as ahead of time as possible.
I want you to arrive within one week.

Please give me mail when the product launch ends.
I am looking forward to the commodity's coming.

Not sure how the translating software will explain that airmail has been discontinued by the USPS and is no longer available as a shipping option. Wanna make some guesses?

Whatcha doin' tonight?

Tonight we got together with people from church to play some games. We played Settlement, and I had fun even though it took me awhile to get the hang of it.

Last night, we met up with team-memberss to revisit the likely future home of VF...more to come on that. Earlier in the day, I met with ladies to plan the Bible Study/Book Club groups that will begin meeting this summer.

On Monday, we had our psuedo-annual VF business meeting and added Danber to the leadership team (board...what are we?) officially and did some other work, which I will also write about later.

Sunday, of course, was church and Father's Day and we had lunch with my hilarious brother and friends Robin and Kim.

I frankly forget what happened Saturday because that was so long ago. But I will say that tomorrow I'm not so sure about, or Saturday, but Sunday is church and our "medium not small" group will be coming over to bbq and hang out. Tuesday will be the mixer for the ladies Bible Study/book club, Thursday we'll be cleaning toilets for our next servant evangelism project (and I am pretty excited about it) Friday is Sara's bridal shower, and Sunday, we get to paint the cement horse outside the local florist's shoppe to advertise Vintage....(and no, painting the horse is NOT an euphemism for anything).

All that to say, my life is all tangled up with these people and my world is revolving around being with them and living life together...and I'm pretty happy about that. What a difference a year makes.

Before & After

Miss Muffet asked me for a BIG haircut. I must admit that I was not initially all that interested in cutting it...I love how it has highlighted in the sun and the all-American girl look she has been sporting for a while now. But I thought about how I was never allowed to get my hair cut until I was in 8th grade and how I really hated that. I decided that I was proud of her for not being vain about her hair and that she isn't trying to look too grown up. And also for realizing that hair will grow back, so you don't have to get all weird and attached to it. And also...I don't think she's really brushed it since we got the pool... So I cut it. She looks like my sister's -Ashley- Mini-Me.



Here's her first look at it..She loves it...

Painfully true of me...

"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones."

Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Sabotage...

So if you read the Grenz, (and you should) you know that Robb and I are engaged in what Mattie has called "The Fatness/Skinniness Contest." For those of you who are rolling your eyes, all, "You don't need to lose weight" at me, please let me assure you that the only pants that are really comfortable for me right now involve stretchy material, preferably fleece.

So yeah, we're having the contest...whoever has lost most lbs by percentage by the end of August gets either a new digital camera (me) or an Ipod (Bobb). So far, I am winning: I am minus 8 ugly pounds of chub. I am not about to divulge my secrets for success, but I will say that I may have been a little too cruel by providing this as Robb's Father's Day meal:

Ribs
Cornbread casserole
green beans with bacon
BBQ beans
(since blue laws still exist in Arkansas and I didn't think of beer yesterday) sweet iced tea

and just to make sure I've got the contest sewn up...

cherry-cheese-amoretto-fudge brownies.

oh yeah. I'm so getting a new camera in August.

new profile pic

I put up a new profile pic of myself, mostly because I was tired of sharing space with a creature that pees every time she falls asleep...it was humiliating.

So Mattie looked at it and said..."It's like the good side of you and the bad side of you."

How very profound.

;)

My Bank was Robbed

Out with Hubby last night, we needed to stop at the bank for a much needed deposit, but found it being ribboned with police tape, with more police cars screaming into the parking lot. A week ago, at about that time we were there, getting turned down for refinancing on our house in MI...they have casual Fridays, hand out free popcorn and coffee and just generally have a lot of people streaming in and out. I couldn't imagine why someone would pick that time of day...there would be a lot of witnesses.

So we went to the bank in Walmart to make our deposit, and I asked the clerk what was happening. "They got robbed," he replied with a head bob.
"Wow, what is somebody thinkinig...at that time of day?" I wondered allowed.
"They can't be actually thinkinig" the clerk replied.

and than I made him laugh...

"Yeah, robbing a bank..that is just so cliche."

well, it is.

Went on a Date Lasts Night...

and got a new coffee grinder.

I feel like a whole new woman.

"Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes."

Henry David Thoreau

Clearly, getting out of bed was a mistake

It's 9:14 a.m.

I woke up with a stiff neck
the kids broke an antique jar on the bathroom floor
and the coffee bean grinder just broke...before I got the beans ground...

no no no....

A Funny List

Here's a funny list of things I thought of last night:

Medication for Sid to stop peeing in her sleep
the Dentist
running shoes and a new bathing suit
new underwear for everybody
printing the pictures I've taken...all 2500 of them...
cement pavers by the pool
new jeans...my old ones have developed a hole in the thigh...yikes
piano lessons for the kids
taking a drive without feeling guilty for wasting gas...
fresh fruit and veggies from the farmer's market...

Some things I would do with a little extra money...

What would you do with a little extra?

Been Listening to this non-stop....

This is Jacob of the esteemed house of Wolfgang. He's from a small town called Ithaca, MI...the same place a lot of really wonderful people I know have grown up, and then went out and became somebody. It's an old story but a good one....

What's that bad taste in my mouth...oh yeah....

Item: HUGE Lot 2T Girls Clothes-GAP Old NAVY PLACE+35+ Pieces (160123186813)
This message was sent after the listing closed.
xxxxxxxxx is the winner.
This lot is awful! Stains everywhere--let me know what you intend to do. Otherwise I will follow through accordingly. Thanks, Dawn

My reply:
Hi Dawn. I'm not sure what you were expecting...I tried to indicate that these were play-clothes. What would be fair? Vanessa

Her:
Full refund including shipping--these were not even fit for play clothes. They were in no way as described.

My reply:
I'd like to think about this for a day or so. I will get back to you.

Her:
You should have thought about it before you boxed up a bunch of garbage and put it on ebay. I want a refund immediately, or I will put a chargeback on your paypal account.


Paypal's definition of a chargeback: an unfortunate aspect of working with the public.

Ding Ding Ding...i think we have winner: The rudest person I've dealt with in 5 years on ebay.

The Cavalry is Coming...

I can't elaborate yet, but help is on the horizon.

For those of you who have been talking to God about this (notice I didn't say praying because like my friend said, "Really, how many more times can I ask Him for the same thing???") I'll tell you that this reply from heaven has the clear, pure sound of a well-constructed chord...there is a goodness to it that shows intelligent design and sweet emotion. It feels like love to me. It feels like I am breathing air again.

Is this the dumbest thing you've ever seen?

Be nice, because I made it. But not too nice, because I'm trying to sell it.
and this....

Mattie-ism

"Mom, when people are getting married, the girl is called the beyonce ...what's the boy called?"


to the left, to the left....

Serenity Now....

Here's a little overview of what is going on in my life right now:

My kids are home from school and I am enjoying having them around. They say funny things, like this morning, when I thanked the kids for helping me get my ebay boxes out the door, Vin said, "Hey Mom, any time." The swimming pool is still the most awesome thing we have ever bought, even though we have basically lived out the episode of the Simpsons when they get a pool. There was some kid out there yesterday that I had never met...she came and left before I ever did find out.

I continue in my war with the dog over the screen door. You've heard of "Are you smarter than a fifth grader?" I don't mind a fifth grader being smarter, but I am pretty pissed when the dog continues to outsmart me. So far, I have twice rescreened it, added a handle for the dog at the bottom of the door, and added nails across the bottom of the door to prevent her from pawing it open. She is winning, though, as there is a new hole at the bottom of the door, which as you know, only lets in the thing I really hate...FLIES. They promise to be just as horrendous as last year, when it was basically impossible to eat a PB&J outside without looking like somebody in a Sally Struthers ad.

This morning, I packed and shipped 11 ebay boxes, bought a wedding dress, talked to my friend, made a balanced breakfast for the kids and even watched part of Good Morning America. What is my secret for getting so much done with the kids around? It's called television. Don 't judge me.

Why a wedding dress? Oh that would be for the future Mrs. Carl Christensen... While I am only the Matron of Honor, I do feel a little bit like the Mother of the Bride too. I have successfully located and purchased my dress, (originally 110.00, snagged for 38 dollars with shipping!
, as well as Sara's dress (originally 799.00) for 230.00 with shipping...Hooray for Ebay. It's nice that I can use my expertise for something practical, huh? We have most of the shower planned thanks to Jaye T-who is a genius for planning. Now we just have...well...let's not think about that today, we can think about that tomorrow, fiddly-de-de. Vin, by the way, is very thrilled to be the "ring barrier" in the wedding. October 6th is the day.

I also managed to smash my toenail this morning which is now throbbing and blackened. The means to this end? What else, but a large and clunky mug of coffee which I managed to drop directly onto the toe from about chest level...don't ask because I really have no idea how I did that. It HURTS.

My usually recalcitrant 3 year old asked me if she could please go to bed after we ate lunch today. No problem, sweetie. She also informed me of an oncoming poopy with enough time to achieve potty success. This has happened so rarely, that I really needed to record it here for the world to know.

My oldest, by the way, hardly ever makes headlines here because she is so good and keeps herself busy with her books, friends, music and chores. She is the kid that made us think we were such great parents that we should take on more parenting duties. By the time we realized it was just her wonderful personality, it was too late and the kids had us outnumbered. She is currently buried in a book, still in her pjs because she, unlike the other two, knows how to sleep in on a rainy summer day. She's a genius child, I tell you.

I continue to eek by on Ebay. I have several crafty projects in mind to try my hand at selling, but only time will tell. The bottom line is, our money is so tight it squeaks right now, and I am exhausted from walking this tightrope balancing act. I look forward to a time in my life when I don't feel like freaking out because we are out of sliced cheese. These last couple of weeks have been trying. I don't feel completely freaked out on the one hand, since God has always met our needs, but on the other hand I'm just tired of it being out there, yanking us around. This week, we could get news that is great or we could get news that is devistating....(think, "Robb, you've done a great job here, but we no longer have need of your services.") Last week we got two big hits: the church in MI needs us to start repaying the loan they gave us when we bought our house there, and the bank turned us down for refinancing the house. Maybe I should be more upset about this, but I guess I just keep thinking that we serve the God that does all things justly. We have never been more careful with our money than in the last 8 months, and I know God is aware of that. I can't figure out any clear way that we can make things work, other than God doing what only God can do.

We looked at a different location for Vintage this past Friday and we are talking it over...It has some HUGE benefits and some HUGE drawbacks. It at least has the distinction of being one of the only places we can actually have a discussion about. Most of the storefronts, etc, that we have researched so far have been OUT OF THE QUESTION. So we wait and watch and pray.

Uncle Pookie is visiting my parents with his kids this week. It makes me insanely homesick. It looks like a visit home isn't gonna happen this summer. I forget now how long it has been since I saw my parents...I guess since last summer? It makes me too sad to think about any more so I'm done talking about that now.

There is considerable interest in starting a women's Bible study or book club at Vintage and it is coming together nicely. I love when a ministry starts out of enthusiasm and love and need instead of out of sense of duty and obligation. It is a wonderful thing to watch unfold.

So there's a little overview of what is shaping my day-to-day life right now. Now it's time to do a laundry...make a little supper....get down tonight...

SELL THIS

Since I have no Steve and Barry's close by, I can't do this, but if you have an ounce of sense in your head, get your butt to this store and buy a BUNCH of SJP's Bitten Clothes and sell them on ebay. I will buy them from you...I promise....size 6/8 please.

Worst Case of Ebay Block Ever

I spent about an hour yesterday, trying to decide on something to sell on ebay and came up with umm.....nothing. This is the worst time of year for me to sell, but I've gotta come up with something. There is a listing sale today and I am in a funk the size of Cleveland. You would think hunger would be a pretty good motivator, but no....

Okay...pray for me....I'm going into the garage....

A first time for everything....

Tonight was our first time getting in the pool together as a family. While still a little chilly, I figure the cold will only help me burn fat trying to warm my shivering carcass.

I decided to try on a pair of the goggles the kids are always fighting over and ducked under the water to try them out. I emerged at the surface with a "Wow! Those are really great!"

"Haven't you ever tried on goggles before?" Robb asked.

After a moment of quick reflection I recalled, "No....never..."

Robb shook his head in surprise, "What did you think everyone was doing with them all this time?"

Always honest, I replied bluntly, "Being wimps."

So, I beg everyone's pardon who I ever mentally accused of being a wimp for wearing goggles...they are very nice. You were right and I was less-than-informed.

Summer DAY ONE

Insomnia.

Unable to wake up because of aforementioned insomnia.

Catch up on blogs, the total-lack-of-ebay-progress, and email
post pics of new pool, which we are sure is going to make the summer boredom problem disappear.

Kids attack me at computer (okay, so I'm still in bed...love my laptop).

7:57 a.m....first request to get into the pool.

Explain to kids that I have to get some stuff done today before we can swim...

like...

pack 10 ebay boxes, (When can we swim?)
print labels, (neighbor kid arrives wondering when we can swim)
affix labels (can we swim yet???)
affix some more labels (kid number one gets stung by a bee)
affix the rest of the labels, nearly mixing up two of them, but catching it just in time....

clean poopy bum, switch swimsuit that is on backwards, talk to friend on phone, IM hubby, think about women's ministry email, and how the house needs to be cleaned for leadership meeting tonight...

Can we swim?
NO...you are sitting in time out for asking me again when I told you we had to wait until I got my work done...

Finally, thw pool opens and the children splash in, only to hop back out within a half hour because they are cold, have to pee, want their own boogie board....

This continues for the next four hours: While towels are dragged through the mud, I explain the rules (Go pee at your own house and bring your own towel to drag through the mud)

Make lunch, after shooing neighbor kids to their own houses
"But we don't have any ham" says one kid to me, to which I reply,
"Neither do I." I have the slices of bread counted until grocery day, and their are no extras for a noodgy 10 year old who will likely toss the sandwich I make her anyway.

Somehow in the next several hours, I mow the lawn, change another poopy diaper, clean up a bit, take a shower, make brownies that don't turn out,
make supper, my now-becoming-much-anticipated iced tea, and a batch of cookies to cover for the not-so-great brownies,
mentally prep for the meeting,
grouch at hubby for no apparent reason,
and put out the the "pool is closed" sign I made for the front door,
pin up a dress for a wedding my friend is in and oh yes...
vacuum so that the lines look neat in the carpet.

Meeting ensues with actual adults and much laughter.

Check email, track lost typewriter in San Francisco
Fall asleep in front of Leno...

Wake up around 3 with insomnia.

Happy Summer

Well thanks to some wonderful anonymous person who gave me a gift card to Target a couple of months ago and somebody else who chipped in, our summer is looking pretty fantastic.

If you are contemplating an Intex 12' x 36" pool, let me say that this was a piece of cake to set up and it seems to be fine even though our back yard is not level. (I doubt we could have used the kind with an air ring, though.) We literally had a kid in the pool (while filling it of course) within 1/2 hour of opening the box. It took longer to put the ladder together. And, if you are counting heads in the picture, we had a neighbor kid in the pool within 2 hours of setting up the pool.

If you look at the next to the last picture, you'll see when Charleigh got her first big dunking. She cried then, but told me this morning that going under the water was fun. ( Don't worry Mom, the cover is on, and the ladder is out.)

You'll notice I did not get into the pool...there is no sense getting into a pool until the water is not so cold that it gives you foot cramps!

It still fits.

Went dress shopping with Sara on Saturday....and it's amazing how David's Bridal still smells the same. Came home to find my veil and couldn't resist checking to see if my dress still fits me...and sure enough...with a little tugging and giving up breathing for 10 minutes...it fits! 11 years later.

Hey Mom...where's Grandma's dress? She wore hers for a "fashion show" in her 50s or 60s after 7 kids.

Feild Day at Harp Elementary

I spent the day at the kid's school yesterday for Field Day. As you can clearly see in the pictures, we had a blast. I was one of a handful of parents who were able to volunteer (thanks Ron for hanging out with Charleigh all day). This proved to be a great experience not just for the fun we had, but also for the gift of perspective I received.

Vin's teacher has told us more than once that he is perfect, which Mattie doesn't believe and said so in one of her school compositions! But yesterday when one teacher asked the class for a volunteer, somebody who "always plays by the rules and does the right thing," his class actually called out "Calvin" in unison and some of them put their hands down. Then, the kindergarten aid, Miss Laura, walked up and said, "Are you Calvin's mom? OH, I just need to tell you how much I love him...he is just so special to me....such a great helper." Later in the day, she gave him a card with gift certificates to Sonic for ice-cream and a hamburger.

In Mattie's class, I got to pick up her self-portrait, which had been on display in the main hallway since returning from the Art Center of the Ozarks Exhibition. I can't wait to frame and hang it here. I spent the morning with her class, and the afternoon with Vin's.

I often hear from others how nice my kids are, but I actually got to observe them both in their own little social world, and it really helped me see that we are doing all right on this parenting thing so far. It was a real confidence builder. I was pleased to see my kids demonstrate respect for adults and classmates, compassion for classmates, a great sense of adventure and appreciation for what the teacher's had planned for them. I was so proud of them. It was a good day.

Happiness Quotes Amuse Me

Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed by adults to children, and by children to adults.

Thomas Szasz